is it true or purely coincidence?

hey my lovelies.
It's been cold lately, because it's rainy season now.
brrrr....

oh, lately I always get nightmare and it's almost 3 nights already.
I don really remember the details, but it's pretty scary.

two nights ago, I dreamt that I was possessed by an evil spirit.
It was pretty scary, you know! really scary!!!

last night, I dreamt that someone intend to kill me with bombs!
Gosh!!

I read somewhere about this cold weather. It says 'The colder the room, the higher chance for you to encounter with nightmares'.....

it's pretty cold these two or three days. Even my roommate decided to turn off the fan because it's bloody cold, like Iceland!

Maybe it's true then.......
Nightmare......

Why would I?

hey lovelies. It's been a while since the last time I update here.
Well, it's final exam week now and I have one more paper to go... and then, hasta la vista, putas!

3 months at this friggin hostel, I've learnt my lesson... I have made friends with wrong people.
yup and all I can say now is... I kinda regret the first day I met them (but lucky enough I'm not in the same room with them. If not, it would more miserable than hell!)

I don't want to say what have they done. I better keep it secret.
I just can't be nice with them anymore.
If they wanna hate me, go ahead. I have my own life to settle with than wasting my time entertain people like them.

Oh, university life is kinda fun.
But, I just hate nosy people. I just heard that people hating me and keep wondering why I always wear black. I was like... Duh! why you wanna know so much?
They judged me before they even know why I like goth.
They judged my appearance, my makeups, and my attire.

Oh well. I just don't give a crap anymore. I already know that I will get that kind of reactions from many people.
whatever, losers. I would be glad if you guys stop being so nosy about me.

Have I ever judged you guys as an idiot for obsessing over Kpops or whatsoever?
Have I ever judge you guys for wearing too many pink?
Have I ever judge you guys for dressing up like a slut/hoe/whore?
Have I ever judged you guys for not wearing hijab?

my answer is NO!
I would never judge people based on your appearance or things you like.
I only judge people based on your personality!
so yeah, please stop judging me, bugging me and also stop being so NOSY about my life!
I am so tired of this!!!

STOP!

LIFE IN HOSTEL~ part 2

hey! part 2's here!
It's been a month I lived in KL and all went well for me (except there's too many drawing need to finish..... *nomnom pillow*)
Hostel is pretty nice and very comfortable!
classes also very cool and awesome (except for programming class... it's soo hard! my background was pure science, not ICT... so it's pretty hard for me...)

hey, I wanna tell you guys a funny story!
last week, me and my friend were busy doing our work in her room. suddenly, her roommate turned off all the lights in the room and I was kinda shock. the heck is happening?
that girl walked out and she seems to talk secretly to her another friend.
few seconds later, she came in with Ira and on her hands, there's a chunk of peanut butter and she threw it to my other friend, Mirza. After that, they started to sing a birthday song.
oh! I forgot it's Mirza's brithday!
me and my friend, Mel sang together.

Mirza then took some peanut butter and pay them back.Me and Mel just laughed. suddenly they stopped.... and looked at us... with an evil smile lurking on their face.
GODDAMNIT! they want to attack us!

we ran to the balcony quickly and blocked the door!
they tried to open it, but we pushed the door harder!
then, Mel yelled, 'the window! close the window!!!'
I was damn freaked out and didn't moved an inch!
suddenly. Ira climbed the window, with the peanut butter chunk on her hand, ready to attack us!
we screamed so damn loud (note, it was in the middle of night that time and we know we shouldn't scream so loud that time. but what can we do? we were so damn freaked out!) and Mel almost kicked Ira's face, hard!

we waited for few minutes outside (and of course, I quickly closed the window to avoid Ira sudden appearnce again.... damn freaky!)
and then, one of our friend said 'u can come in now, dummies. the war have end. come in now.'we came into the now-peanuty-smelled-room and I quickly ran from that room to my room.
Goddamn, I don't wanna be a victim, cuz to wash the peanut butter from your shirts is so nuisance! on top of that, in the middle of night.

hahah, this is a very nice memory for us.
I really enjoy my stay here in the hostel.

OFFICIALLY A DEGREE STUDENT~ part 1

pheew, hi guys!
I am soooo sorry I didn't update this blog for quite a while.
too many stuffs happen in my life.

After almost a year break, I finally got place in university!
and on top of that I got my dream course, animation.
Thank God. Now I am officially a UniKL student!
three cheers for me!

hey, psst! I wanna confess something. yeah, closer.
I am a crybaby. wanna know why?
the first night I arrived there, I cried. I have never been far from my family (even though the campus not that far from my home in Sepang, but hey! It's better for me to cry for my family than wasting my precious manly tears for useless boys! Am I right?).
The next day, we went for camping at Dr.Campsite in Hulu Langat for 3 days.
Gah!!!! forest!!!!! I love forest, but I hate bugs.

eww! bugs! nooo!

It's kinda fun tho. But on second day, I just kinda hate the 'Drama' they made.I know it was a set up made by them, but I still hate it. We kinda have a telematch that evening, and these poor, unfortunate people got something (it's a package of real drugs and a pregnancy test. They use it for... uh.... how to explain this shitzles... uh....this camp is sort like a motivation camp/boot camp-like I guess. yeah you can imagine how we've been through) and too many drama  happens next. I don't know how to explain further cuz I myself don't really remember the details..... *kicked*

But! but... I met a fujoshi friends there!!!!
oh, there's something I wanna tell you guys. During the telematch that evening, they have a game named 'magic tree' where they hanged a few apples on the tree and we need to eat and finish it... without using our hands.

me and my friend call em, yaoi tree!!

Since the ladies were too shy to do it, the gents volunteer to do it....... and me as a fujoshi, standing in one corner, resisting myself from fangirling to hard. Then, there's a scene... this guy and his friends were struggling to eat the apple... and it looks like they were kissing. My face was so damn red that time and almost got a nose bleed over that fanservice, including my friend. we were fangirling too hard for that shitzle!

heheheh~
and at night we kinda have a bond fire thingy.
in fact, this is my first time camping in the forest, with bond fire....... (only missing the marshmallow. hahah!)

On the last day at the campsite, we have jungle trekking. It was fun, but since that was my first time.... I was sooo afraid and cried...... (boooo, cry baby!) and my clothes all full of dirt!
(oh, the campsite have water shortage and we cant have shower for three days!!!! *shivers*)
but hey, it is my dream since I was in high school to go for jungle trekking and I finally got the chance! After jungle trekking, we finally can go back to hostel. aahhhh!!! shiawaseness!!

The next day, we have our last activity in the campus and it was super fun and hilarious!
I have the video, but too lazy to upload in here. but I have the picture with the senpai!
ngahahah!

hahah! there! there!!!!!! that senpai really looks like my fav singer..... Anuar zain. *got kicked, again*
okay, that's all I can post here. wait for part 2, coming up!
bye bye~

okay, now I'm confused.

recently, I just got an offer for animation course in uniKL and I was so happy!
It's my dream to take that course and I wanna prove to my relatives (dad side) that be an animator also can be successful bastardo like others!!!!!
booyah!!! I will prove it to you guys!!!!

unfortunately, that University was located at Jalan Sultan Ismail (which they call red area cuz full of thugs, night clubs and so on... my parents said) and they said, go apply for MMU. it's nearer to our house....
I was like, whoa there. Before this, you always asking me to apply somewhere far to teach me how hard life is, but now wanted me to apply nearer University?

okay, now I'm confused.
I'd like to try somewhere far, cuz I'd like to try new adventures in my life.
I know it will be hard, but there's no harm for me to try, right?
RIGHT?
oh, and I wish I can continue studies abroad.... hurm, maybe Japan, US or Germany?
I really wish to study abroad at one of these countries.
wish me luck.

(okay, I apply for the private first. waiting for UPU is so damn long and I feel like dying waiting for it! kay, bye!)

pedih sepedih pedihnya hati ini.

apa perasaan kau, bila orang bandingkan or seolah-olah lupakan kewujudan kau, terutamanya dalam family sendiri?

sedih, pedih, bengang, marah dan sebagainya kan?

inilah situasi aku sekarang.
mentang-mentanglah adik aku yang jantan tu SPM straight A,
semua orang pandang dia, congrats kat dia.
bila aku cakap aku STPM dapat 2B 2C, MUET band 3...... ada aku dapat warm congrats macam tu?

tak.

aku tak dapat warm congrats macam yang adik aku dapat.
malahan, bapak aku bila pergi mana-mana, dia lebih bangga kat adik aku tu dibandingkan dgn aku.
siap canang cerita lagi pasal kehebatan adik aku dapat straight A dalam SPM.
aku?
dia tak cerita sangat.

sedih tau tak bila kena banding sampai macam tu sekali.
adakah aku ni memalukan keluarga??
aku ni teruk sangat ke??

aku ni tak layak ke masuk Universiti macam orang lain?
sakit tahu tak hati ni.
sakit sangat.
setiap malam, dalam gelap, hanya air mata je peneman aku bila diingatkan balik benda ni.

teruk sangat ke aku?
tak layak ke aku, sebagai bekas pelajar STPM nak belajar tinggi jugak macam yang orang lain expect kat adik aku sorang tu??
bodoh sangat ke aku??

I've done my best for my STPM

hey there!
recently, I just got my overall STPM result and I got 2.5, and my MUET is in band 3.
I asked my teacher, she said I have a chance to continue studies in any universities.
I was quite happy and grateful with my result...
unfortunately, my dad didn't seem so delightful with my result...

okay, that's really driving me crazy.
My bro got straight A's in his SPM, and he got a very warm congratulations from dad...
but not me......

yeah, life sucks when you always been compared with others....
especially if you're the first child in your family.
yeah.
LIFE SUCKS!

a whole new world~

guten tag, mein lieblings (I just wanna practice my German. sorry if there's any mistakes)
for now, I've already applied 3 jobs.
I applied for MASkargo (that's not my idea, but my parents.... they insisted me too. =_= )
MAHB, and 7E.

the first one, I already submitted my resume's online, and wait for the replies through my mail......

waiting... I'm waiting....

*2 weeks later* still no response. (I'm glad, because I don't wanna work for MAS!)

then, last week, I went for a MAHB interview (vacancies for KLIA2 that will be opened this May).
damn, I was so nervous, because it's my first time go for interview like this.
very...very...VERY NERVOUS!

I chose CSA (Customer Service Agent) at first, then I realized, I made a mistake. and I changed to F&B (food and Beverages)
as I stepped into the office, and gave them my certs.....
they the one who got freaked out after seeing it (especially my MUET. dude, I just got lower band 3, not band 6. get some chill pill dudes.)

something like this... (well, this is too much, demmit)

I was in an awkward situation that time. I didn't even get to introduce myself to them or told them my background.
yeah people are supposed to feel the butterflies in their stomach, right? but not me, I was in total awkward situation.

then they said, "so this is your first time applying for job?"
me: "..yyyyeeeah...."
"okay, we will inform you later. please be assure to leave your number. we will give you a part time job"
me: "....ooookaaaayyy...."

and that's it. my interview was not even more than 5 minutes I guess. Guess I'm the youngest person who apply for the job (that time), because people who came there mostly have working experience, University students etc.
*4 days later... no phone calls or mail..... sad*

 and this morning, I went for an interview at 7E.
well, the interview's went well, and the shop owner said she will call me later.
and guess what?
just now she called me and said that I will start working this Friday.
oh, thank God!

I will work hard!
I will save up some money for my University!
GAMBARU!!!

weird is awesome!

first of all,
when is the last time I updated my blog?
it's been a while tho.
Gomene~

hey 2014, nice to meet you.
2013 was a tough year da? (kolkolkol)

new year, but I'm still the same as usual.
why?
because I am different from other young ladies outside there.

-I like animes, games and manga (and I am pretty sure not many young lady at my same age enjoy this).
   I know people were talking bad about me because I like this kind of stuffs. but I don't care at all.

this anime series is about world history. try watch it! it's cool, full of history facts and full of handsome characters! *uhukuhuk*

Attack on Titan. apparently, to those who have weak stomach, please don't watch it. for those who hardcores, GO WATCH IT!

-I like heavy metals (mostly Japanese band), some good classical musics, and anime OST's.
  most people who I met definitely asked me, "hey, you like K-Pop? I love (insert any K-Pop band, cuz I don't know any band), the are awesome and cool!" sorry girls, you talked with the wrong person. I like HEAVY METAL, SYMPHONY METAL song. (I'll shortlisted my most favourite only, because I have so many favourite J-rock/V-kei band!)

malice mizer band. my most favourite era definitely Klaha era. they have 3 eras. first, Tetsu's era, then Gackt era and lastly Klaha era.

second one is Moi Dix Mois (I don't even know how to pronounce it....) they are so awesome!

versailles... AAHH! KAMIJO SAMA! (note: I heard this band is in hiatus right now. oh, you said those two chicks look hot? think again, dearie. NOT A CHICA. BUT CHICO)

Kaya Rose. his voice is so cool! (did I said 'his'? yup, it's a HE. don't worry, he just dressed like this when performing. he is such an awesome singer. BOYS/GENTS BEWARE! I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE!)

-I like Gothic (Victorian, Lolita, Elegant Gothic Aristocrat, Elegant Gothic Lolita, and Steampunk) fashion styles
   I don't know why, I just like the styles. It looks elegant, mysterious, and beautiful. I once told my friends/classmates that I prefer this kind of fashion....and they kinda like mocking it. meh, they don't know anything about this style. it's very popular now in Japan!

victorian style

-last but not least, I HATE PINK COLOUR, I HATE STUFFS THAT IS TOO CUTE THAT MAKES ME WANNA GO AND HUNG MYSELF, I HATE TEDDY BEARS.
  funny and weird, da?

okay, thats all for the first entry of 2014.
see ya next time. gonna blast of some BIOSPHIA song now.
AUF WIEDERSEHEN~